I watched my father spend years of his life, reading, searching, consulting and then rebuilding his Packard piece by piece. He poured over that car with attention to every last detail as he diligently brought it back to perfection from next to nothing. Over the years we would talk for hours about his car. We would discuss the times he drove it as young man in his late teen years, and then how he sold it only to find it and buy it back again five years later. Never was any explanation required for why he did what he did or why he felt the way he felt. It was just the way it was in my family, and that was that. It is really no surprise to me that I have the same feelings for my Bronco, but the curious side of me, wants to know where this comes from, what it really is, and why. I find myself asking a lot of questions in my internal search. Some answers are more obvious than others, but they’re not the entire story, these answers lie deeper within, and it is with this post that I will write them all out, and see what I end up with. We shall see…
What is it about machines (especially vehicles) that captures a person’s imagination so completely. I mean after all it is just a machine, a bunch of steel, rubber and other elements fused together to provide us with transportation. What is it about the idea of the driving, flying or sailing something from point A to B and enjoying every minute of it? Why is it only certain types of vehicles resonate with individuals while others do not. Why do some individuals look at vehicles as just machines, and nothing more, while others obsesses about them, tear them apart, modify them, and do everything within their power to make them their own? I am guilty of this behavior and I really cannot explain why. I had a boat once that I had a lot of fun with it, and I had other cars that I really enjoyed as well, but neither of these machines had the same effect on me as my Bronco does, and when the time came, I sold or traded them without looking back. Why do I still possess this vehicle? Why do I still plan on driving it as often as I can for as long as I can? What is it about such a machine that captivates my imagination so completely?
Maybe it is the historical significance that it played in my younger years , and as I get older, it is something that reminds me of those days. However as I said earlier, I had other cars back then, and I got rid of them without looking back, so that may be only be some of the reason, but not all. What is it about this particular machine that interests me so? I really cannot explain it to myself or anyone else, and not sure if I ever will be able to. However recently I discovered that I am not alone in my feelings and passions for an old vehicle…
By chance, I watched a fascinating documentary called “Love The Beast” on Netflix a few months ago. It was written and developed by Australian actor Eric Bana in 2009, and the whole movie is about his obsession with his 1974 Ford that he has had since the 80’s. Throughout the movie he goes on a journey to explore why he feels the way he does about his car, and what it all means. He talks to Dr. Phil, Jay Leno and Jeremy Clarkson in his quest for an answer. He also shares with us his attempts to run a 5 day road race in Tasmania in his prized vehicle. We see him racing his car in this grueling race in the 90’s and then in the same car in the more recent past. We hear his friends talk about their experiences and their vehicles while growing up around Eric in the 80’s and 90’s. As a supplemental story presented early in the movie, we watch as Eric and his father try unsuccessfully to get the father’s old Ford Thunderbird started, but after the entire movie unfolds Eric returns once again to his father’s humble garage (this time with his old friends) to successfully get the old T-Bird running again. We are then rewarded with a ride along as Eric drives the old T-Bird with his dad riding shotgun around their neighborhood in suburban Melbourne. The bond between father and son displayed in these scenes is quite obvious and genuine, and it clearly resonates with me on many levels. What else I find interesting is that the parents seem to be living in a very basic and middle class neighborhood in his childhood home, and clearly Eric is now a man of means, but the parents seem content to stay where they always lived, and the fact that their son is a Hollywood success has very little impact on their lives. Totally fascinating to me, the whole movie is a testament to Mr. Bana’s upbringing and character, but that’s a story for another post. 🙂
While watching this movie I related to it on so many levels that it started to get scary to me. Not that I have a ton of things in common with Mr. Bana, as I am just a humble college professor/IT guy, and he is a movie star, but as I pull back the layers on what he is discovering in his movie, I started to get a clearer picture of what it is about my Bronco and my fixation with it, that makes me feel the way that I feel (as it does with him). We both come from very middle class beginnings. We both had father’s that took us by the hand when we were young and developed within us an appreciation for cars and the culture of automobiles. We both selected a vehicle at young age, and made a commitment to that vehicle, and (this is it where it really deviates from the norm) we both honored that commitment. Again, for who? For what?
Eric’s questions do not get answered as clearly as he would have liked…I watched as Dr. Phil tried to explain it some kind of psycho-babble that made some sense, but not really. Then Jay Leno (whom I really like) kind of summed it up as best as he could by saying it is just the way it is, you like cars and they become your life’s obsession, and that’s about all there is to it. Eric finally presented his questions to Jeremy Clarkson’s and his response was rather indifferent and abrasive. Without giving away the entire story, Eric’s Ford was damaged in a race, and he was showing pictures of it to Mr. Clarkson, surveying the damage to the vehicle in pictures, he told Eric’s that his car was a “muscle car” and that all muscle cars were “crap”. The look on Eric’s face was quite telling…(I felt for you at the moment Mr. Bana, I really did). I have always really liked Mr. Clarkson, and his show Top Gear on the BBC is a lot of fun, but I am certain that he did not have any clue where Eric was coming from with his questions, or he would not have been so blunt. The amount of passion Eric has for his vehicle and it’s impact on his life is rare in many auto enthusiasts, but it is not unheard of either. Clarkson should have recognized this for what it was and should have shown some respect, unless he is unaware of such feelings people have about their machines. If this is the case, then perhaps Clarkson is incapable of feeling the same level of passion about a vehicle that Eric does, which makes this more ironic since Clarkson does spend a lot of time on TV discussing vehicles and the adventures within. Maybe there was more said that was on the cutting room floor, but my opinion of Mr. Clarkson changed after I saw this dialog, and not for the better.
Another very fascinating sequence in the movie that is extremely telling of Mr. Bana’s character, starts with him getting ready for a walk down the red carpet for one of his movie premieres in NYC. The gala event takes place a scant few days after the big road race, which had a nasty outcome. While on the way to the event he looks at the camera says that he is wondering about his car and cannot wait to get back home to see it again. No real concern for the pomp and circumstance that is about to unfold around him, the cameras, the press, the fans…None of it phased him…It was just a job, a source of income for him and his true passion. His thoughts at that time were about a damaged car, on another continent in a garage awaiting his attention, and not the attention of the media and adoring fans that most people would give up their souls for, but not this him. Very odd indeed…Yes, Mr. Bana…Thank you for taking the time and energy to put that movie together. I really enjoyed it, and still do. It helped me get a better understanding of what makes me tick, and to not question the reasons why I obsess about a machine, but to just embrace them and accept them as normal for me.
My last question is…Do these feelings really last a lifetime? Bana did not have a definitive answer to that one, but I do…
My last conversation that I had with my father a few days before he passed away was about his Packard that he was leaving to me. He was telling me about the problems he was having with the engine, and what he was telling me the problem was did not make sense at all (not that he was incoherent or I did not understand), but he was describing a condition in the engine that he said existed and it just made no sense. This prompted a flurry of questions as I tried to gather as much information about the problem and how to fix it…He answered as best as he could, but he was so tired from the fight he was waging with cancer, and after I gathered what I thought was enough information to formulate a strategy, I promised him that I would look into it and fix it for him. He looked at me with a relaxed look on his face, and this told me the one thing that a son would always want to know from his father… He trusted me to get it done. Problem solved…or so it seemed, because I still don’t know what the problem is! He then looked at me again, and asked me a question…”Do you know the best thing about this problem?” he asked. I said “What is that Dad?”…His reply to me was simple…”It’s your problem now.” He passed away a few days later, with his sense of humor intact.
Thanks to Eric Bana and my father for giving me validation, understanding and a purpose for my automotive passions…I will be sure to carry that torch from here on out, and try to instill these passions in the next generation.
